When Did NFLD Join Confederation? Don't Ask President Harper

President Harper showed his ignorance of Canadian history this week when he told the world Newfoundland joined Confederation in 1867.

What the fuck? I thought it was 1949. Oh, it was.

And the leader of the Republican Conservatives made the astonishing flub
on The Rock - in the backyard of Premier Danny Williams.

The arts-hating Harper, a cat lover, was stumbling through Atlantic Canada on a vote-buying junket when he showed how little he knows about Canada.

He left with egg on his face and a puffin between his legs.

Premier Williams, meanwhile, couldn't resist taking a swipe at the hapless Harper.

He said Harper should go back to grade school and pay attention to the history teacher instead of pulling wings off butterflies.

Williams also warned the rest of Canada that if there is an election this fall and Harper gets a majority: "God help us all."

Couldn't have said it any better Danny Boy. Couldn't have said it any better.

Finley's Verbal Flatulance Forces Security Removal

Doug Finley, the masternmind behind the Conservative election in and out advertising scheme in 2006, stumped through Parliament Hill this week thinking he was big man on campus. Until he pissed in the wind and took a shower.

More like dufus on campus, or a Belushi character.

Finley made an arse of himself again, trying to bully and intimidate former Conservative candidates who were conned by President Harper's Republican Conservatives to participate in an elaborate $1.3 million election advertising scheme that is under investigation.

Charges are expected soon. RCMP paddy wagons are filling up their tanks as you read.

Finley was such an idiot that burly security guards, batons in hand, had to be called to physically removed the frumpy chump from a committee room where he stormed into uninvited. The hearings were held to get to the bottom of the fraud.

All Finley did was underscore how the Republican Conservative party snookered candidates, many of whom testified they were duped into the scheme.

But then again, that's the Harper way. His way, or highway.

Fat-Assed Con Snaps Shots Of Media

So we are hearing paranoid Republican Conservatives have taken to sneaking around Ottawa to take photographs of journalists having hamburgers on patios with Liberal political staffers.

This, says one fat-assed Republican Conservative blogger, is proof the National Press Gallery is biased in favour of Liberals.

How fucking ridiculous. When will John Baird come out of the closet? We digress.

The fact Republican Conservatives have taken to stoop so low shows just how scary these creeps are. Hiding in shadows, taking pictures and posting them on blogs.

There is nothing these freaks won't do to tarnish the reputations of those who dare to stand up to President Harper's diabolical plan to destroy a strong and free Canada.

Simply pathetic.

It's bad enough these people broke every rule in the Elections Canada handbook to buy the 2006 federal election.

Now they are running scared, back to their parents basements where they yank off with delight to free Internet porn while mommy bakes macaroni casserole.

Explain The Tape President Harper

President Harper scowled and kicked a cat today after a news report showed a tape of him talking about a financial deal to sway a dying MPs vote is authentic.

The hapless Harper is using every means at his Republican Conservative party's disposal to discredit the legitimate tape recording of his voice talking about a deal to Chuck Cadman.

Harper rightfully fears the tape will be blared over and over again at every stop the climate-denying chump will make during the next federal election.

It was the Young Liberals who really pissed off the cat lover a few months back when they drove around Parliament Hill in a van outfitted with speakers blaring the recording of Harper.

Harper went apeshit, say sources, when the van stopped below his third-floor office and cranked up the volume of the tape with his voice talking about financial considerations.

His lame-duck party hired some so-called audio experts to suggest the tape was doctored.

Now it appears those same experts are backing off their original findings because the Republican Conservatives lied to them about the tape they were given.

Explain the tape Harper.

Idiot Boy Gets Spanked; Harper Bought 2006 Election

Idiot boy Pierrette Potty Mouth Poilievre got smacked upside his head Tuesday by Canada's chief electoral officer who all but confirmed the Harper Republican Conservatives broke every rule in the book to steal the 2006 federal election.

The only party that broke the rules was the Harper Republican Conservatives, Marc Mayrand concluded at a special Commons committee investigating the election scam.

In fact, Mayrand said he double checked the books of all political parties and went as far back as the 2004 election and found only one party had broken the rules. The Republican Conservatives.

So all the whining by Poilievre and Dork Finley, the party's chief arse kisser and campaign manager, has been for not. The RCMP were right to raid the party's downtown headquarters before evidence could be shredded.

You broke the rules. You got caught. Your vindictive and petty attempts to paint all political parties as corrupt has failed.

How Mayrand's testimony will influence an intimidation lawsuit against his office launched by the Republican Conservatives is unknown.

But it does appear Harper's Republican Conservatives will be charged with federal offences for buying the 2006 election in an elaborate advertising scheme.

It's about time some of these feckless twits went to jail.

NDP Whiner; Shut The F Up

When will the media expose Jennifer Wright for who she really is? A honcho-wearing lefty and proud supporter of the NDP? A right-wing Conservative?

Mehtinks a Republican Conservative.

She is also known to many Canadians as a whiner.

She's the person who cries into any microphone shoved in her face to decry the federal Liberal environmental initiative thegreenshift.ca.

Why you ask?

Because she runs some company that sells coffee cups Made in China to Canadians companies dumb enough not to know where the nearest Loblaws is located.

She calls her company Green Shift.

She cries crocodile tears because the name the Liberals are using to sell a policy is similar to the name her company uses to sell products made in some of the most environmentally unfriendly countries on the planet.

Do us all a favour and shut up.

You are damaging the environment with all the hot air you spew, which in turn sends more people to thegreenshift.ca.

Thanks for that.

How Do You Spell Idiot: Poilievre

The diaper-clad twit from Ottawa showed his true colours again this week with comments bordering on racism in an unfounded radio attack on Aboriginals.

This is what happens when control freak President Harper lets his backbench speak their minds (not that many of them have a mind).

Hatred, racism, bigotry, homophobia, anti-abortion drivel - the usual stuff that spews from the mouths of unleashed Republican Conservative MPs.

Pierre Poilievre, voted the most immature MP on Parliament Hill and hated by media and colleagues alike, said Aboriginals were lazy and a drain on Canadian taxpayers.

He made the insensitive comments on a day when MPs and Aboriginal groups were celebrating a new beginning during a ceremony on the Hill.

Ottawa apologized for the horrific treatment received by thousands of Aboriginal children who were taken from their homes and forced into residential schools.

What should have been a solemn ceremony was tainted by Poilievre's shocking comments.

Of course Harper doesn't have the balls to turf the parliamentary secretary.

Remember Tom Lukiwski, the gay basher. He sits proudly in the lesser president's caucus to this day.

Harper is a spineless leader.

Chuck Cadman Deserves Better Than Harper's Lies. Explain The Tape

How stupid is President Harper and the communication flunkies around the cat lover?

Pretty fucking stupid. Amateurs. Dwarfs. Some about to be fired when a new right-wing nutbar takes over as chief of staff.

Everyone knows the Conservatives offered a $1 million bribe to a dying MP to swing his vote. Chuck's wife, daughter and son-in-law confirm the offer was made.

Everyone knows that Harper knew about it, perhaps even instructed his officials to make the offer. (Explain your words on the tape).

How is anyone to know because of his stonewalling. He admits the words are his, but he won't explain what he meant.

Now the Conservatives are seeking a court injunction, trying to get the Liberals to stop using the tape of Harper's apparent acknowledgement that a bribe was offered.

They are running scared. They will lie to a judge, pay a a couple of flunkies hundreds of thousands of dollars to say parts of the tape were doctored.

Perhaps they even paid to doctor the tape themselves. But the tape wasn't doctored. Harper's words are clear as day.

Harper and his George Bush farm team will do anything to make sure the tape is not played over and over again during an election.

And Liberals will greet him at every stop on a campaign, blaring the tape every time he makes a speech until he tells the truth.

Liars should be exposed for who they really are.

Harper Pees Pants?

Much hilarity in the House of Commons on Wednesday over the wet stain on the front of President Harper's pants.

It seems the man who drives women over to the Liberals in droves - that would be Peter Van Lunatic - was so incensed during Question Period he knocked a glass of water on the hapless Harper.

What got him so pissed off? Step forward Liberal Foreign Affairs critic Bob Rae.

Rae had just said in the House that Van Loan liked to pull the wings off butterflies when he was a kid.

The comeback by Rae prompted the over stuffed Van Loonie to jump to his feet in protest and with the grace of an elephant on crack, he knocked the glass flying into the lap of the lesser President, a cat lover.

Probably the first thing Harper has had on his lap in weeks.

As for pulling the wings off butterflies, The Pain is certain that many others on the luddite benches of the Conservatives have done worse.

Cavemen do those sorts of things.