Jason Kenney Needs An Identity: Or another Pizza

We've been laughing so hard at the appointment of Fred Flintstone double Jason Kenney to President Harper's cabinet that we nearly twisted an intestine.

The cat-loving lesser President appointed the human garbage bin to the new position of secretary of state responsible for multi-culturalism and Canadian identity. We are still in stitches.

The stubble-faced irritant, of course, is identity challenged. Multiculturalism to him are the toppings on a deep-dish, combination pizza with extra cheeze.

His new position is merely a front for the Republican Conservative to criss-cross the country on the public dime to woo ethnic support before the next election.

Canadians should be outraged that the always single ass kisser and routine liar in the House of Commons is now responsible for multiculturalism and Canadian identity.

Translated, the China basher wants Canadians to be more like him - a scary neo-con who opposes same-sex marriage, pre-marital sex, abortion and many other issues woven into the fabric that makes up Canada.

Kenney is an ardent proponent of opening the Constitution to legalize his outdated social conservative views.

He is the bridge between President Harper and the lesser President's true advisers, the gun-toting, Bible-thumping, homophobic Christian right.

Kenney uses the same playbook as Republican-Conservative spiritual mentor Ted Haggard, the disgraced former head of the National Association of Evangelicals.

Haggard, of course, gained celebrity status, after lying about and then apologizing for taking drugs and having sex with male prostitutes after a lifetime crusading against taking drugs and having sex with male prostitutes.

Kenney will likely fall on his pulpit too. We can only pray.