Liberal MPs Given Pepper Spray To Defend Against Rabid Tories

The Speaker of the House of Comedy summoned Republican Conservative irritant and all-round lady's man Peter Van Lunatic to his chambers to today for a dressing down, of sorts.

Van Loonie, the latest Republican-Conservative poster boy for ineptitude, lying and why politicians shouldn't buy suits from Sears, was given a stinging weenie rapping from Commons Speaker Peter Milliken for letting a rabid dog loose in the House.

The annoying House leader was also given a leash to pass on to Ottawa-area Republican-Conservative MP Royal Jelly Galipeau after the former Liberal wannabe jumped from the Republican front benches and raced up three rows of Liberal seats to maul and bark at Liberal MP David McGuinty in the Commons on Wednesday.

McGuinty is recovering after a painful series of shots.

Galipeau went postal after McGuinty rightly pointed out that he (and the rest of the Republican caucus) sat on his (their) hands when President Harper blindly took an axe to programs like Court Challenges that have been used successfully to keep the emergency ward open at the francophone Montford Hospital in Ottawa.

Galipeau, not a friend of the federal tax man, should be admitted to a special ward at the hospital for MPs Gone Bananas.

Liberal MPs, on the other hand, were given canisters of pepper spray and cattle prods to defend against anymore attacks that may be launched from the other side.